Lider nodded without looking round.
“She’s going to run a full battery of tests, including ones that can sometimes spot a clone. She pointed out that the Moon usually injected markers as a way to track clones but that part of the procedure could be bypassed.”
“And Pan was probably born, not grown like Allec.”
“Yeah. Anthros don’t usually allow geographic or ancestry DNA testing, and Dr. Toma has agreed not to share whatever information she discovers—except with Pan and with us, of course.”
Silence. Rhys crossed the cabin to hang up his cassock at the end of the bed. On the station, he wore dungarees when he worked in the infirmary. His religious role was as much about location—the chapel on the main tier, the confessional—as his vestments. On-board ship, he carried his role with him and wore what Lider called “full priest regalia”
Lider said, “I spoke to Kylie. She remembers Panfilo and the Alands from that first voyage but not more than about anyone else. The paperwork was in order. She doublechecked her records when the news story about Panfilo came out. The Alands were planning to bring a child with them, but the adoption fell through. Panfilo took that child’s place. Samantha Aland renamed him when they reached Mars.”
“She was trying to be a good mom to an Anthros.”
“She was a decent person. So is Gregory in his way.” Lider paused. “Kylie opened the door to the cabin for me.”
The last line was bitter. Rhys settled beside Lider on the small couch. Lider’s hands were clasped between his knees, his head bent forward.
There had been a moment the night before when their hands touched, actually touched, skin to skin. They stared at each other, smiles readying. Lider reached for Rhys as he had a thousand times in dreams.
No, not exactly nothing. A shiver across the spine like crossing a low forcefield, one built to keep out dust but not humans.
Not enough. Not what they wanted. Lider had wept in frustration, which shouldn’t have been possible, and Rhys couldn’t comfort him, could only ache.
He hadn’t known he could hurt so much for another’s disappointment. His own disappointment, his own endurance, he could manage. Lider’s pain and outrage broke his heart.
Lider said shakily, “I’m so not good at this patience stuff.”
“Don’t do that. Don’t apologize. Stan told you it would be difficult.”
“I was cocky, absolutely sure that all my years watching humans, the extra years with you, would make this process easy. Difficult enough that I could give others advice—I know what you’re going through. I went through it too—not so difficult I want to punch walls.”
“You are handling it, Lider. You’re here. You’re talking to me. We’re both handling it.”
Lider sighed and leaned back. Solid surfaces held him, more than before, which Rhys didn’t point out. Small steps did matter, but neither he nor Lider were particularly enamored with the minutiae of “three steps forward-two steps back.” Both of them preferred all or nothing.
If only fate didn’t tease us—
Played chess. Organized case notes. Discussed Father Malcolm’s assignments. Father Malcolm was tentatively in charge on the station while Rhys was away, but he was under strict instructions to trade off Mass with Father Hadaka, who would come to the station if needed.
They went to bed, Lider stretching out beside Rhys. Rhys woke several times, sure that he felt Lider’s length against his side. He drifted off.
He woke fully to pounding at the door. Nathan, Captain Maxwell’s second in command, stood on the other side.
“Allec’s kid is in trouble,” he said.
Rhys didn’t pull on his cassock. He padded after Nathan in dungarees and a knit sweater, Lider at his side.
Nathan didn’t head to the captain’s office but to the mess hall. They could hear shouting before they crossed the threshold, and Nathan grimaced.
Beyond the counter between the galley and the mess hall, Digory was prepping for next meal, but his eyes were focused on the group near the eating area’s long window, more people than would fit in the captain’s office. Arms folded, face set, Quin stood over the seated Kaiden and Panfilo. Allec stood beside him, quivering with fury as he shouted at—
Rhys sighed.
—Todd Avide, who was waving his hands and shouting in return.
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